Some employers are giving increased importance to hiring people with good social skills in addition to good qualifications. Do you agree or disagree that social skills are as important as good qualifications for job success?
Question
Some employers are giving increased importance to hiring people with good social skills in addition to good qualifications. Do you agree or disagree that social skills are as important as good qualifications for job success?
Your Essay
Câu chứa lỗi
Gợi ý sửa
Giải thích
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6
Overall Band
7
Task Response
6
Coherence
6
Lexical
5
Grammar
The essay presents a clear position on the topic and provides reasons for the viewpoint. However, there are areas that require improvement, particularly in coherence and grammatical accuracy. The essay could benefit from more structured arguments and examples to support the points made.
The essay addresses the task effectively by presenting a clear opinion that social skills are as important as qualifications. It provides relevant examples and reasons to support the position. However, it could benefit from more detailed examples and a clearer distinction between the importance of social skills and qualifications.
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, there is a lack of clear linking phrases and the paragraphs could be better connected. The progression of ideas is sometimes abrupt, affecting the overall coherence.
The vocabulary used is appropriate for the topic and generally clear. However, there is some repetition and a limited range of vocabulary. More variety and precision in word choice would enhance the lexical resource score.
There are several grammatical errors, particularly with article usage, verb forms, and sentence structure. These errors sometimes make the essay difficult to read and understand. Greater attention to grammatical accuracy would improve the score in this criterion.
Detailed Analysis by Paragraph
Question:
Some employers are giving increased importance to hiring people with good social skills in addition to good qualifications. Do you agree or disagree that social skills are as important as good qualifications for job success?
Introduction
In modern society, some argue that employers are increasingly appreciating not only well-qualified individuals but also those with strong interpersonal skills. I fully support this view and will elaborate on my reasons in this essay.
The introduction clearly states the topic and the writer's position. It sets the stage for the discussion but could benefit from a more engaging hook or broader context.
Body paragraph 1
To begin with, possessing good social skills is crucial for maintaining positive relationships with colleagues and supervisors, as effective interaction is crucial in the workplace. For example, during meetings, the ability to comprehend body language and engage in productive conversation is indispensable for preventing boring and fatigue among employees. Furthermore, employees who excel in communication have an advantage in fostering positive relationships with clients. Additionally, when you have good communication skills, you will be getting higher expectations in a recruitment success.
The paragraph provides reasons why social skills are important. However, there is redundancy in stating the importance of communication and some awkward phrasing. The example used is somewhat unclear and could be expanded or clarified.
Body paragraph 2
In addition, I totally agree with the perspective that well-qualified employees are more likely to succeed in their careers. Qualifications serve as evidence of an individual’s efforts and expertise in their field, which is particularly important in specialized sectors such as healthcare. Employers in these fields prioritize experienced and qualified professionals in order to ensure customer satisfaction and maintain high standards of service quality and professionalism.
This paragraph effectively argues the importance of qualifications. It provides a specific example with healthcare, which supports the argument well. However, it could be better linked to the previous paragraph to show the relationship between qualifications and social skills.
Conclusion
In conclusion, both well qualifications and excellent social skills are vital factors for achieving success in the occupation. Therefore, I firmly support the idea that employers should take both aspects into account when evaluating potential employees.
The conclusion summarizes the main points effectively and reiterates the writer's position. However, there is a grammatical error in 'well qualifications' which should be 'good qualifications'. It could also offer a final thought or implication for the future.
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