Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
The essay presents a balanced view of both perspectives regarding the best path to a successful career. The arguments are well-supported with examples, although some areas could benefit from clearer expression and organization.
The essay addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear opinion. However, the opinion could be more explicitly stated in the introduction. The examples provided are relevant, but the explanation of their relevance could be more detailed.
The essay generally follows a logical structure, with clear paragraphing. There is a good use of linking words, but some transitions between ideas could be smoother. The conclusion summarizes the main points effectively.
The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary and some use of higher-level words. However, there are occasional inaccuracies and repetition, such as the repeated use of 'successful career'. Greater variety and precision in word choice would enhance the essay.
The essay contains a variety of sentence structures, though some grammatical errors are present, such as subject-verb agreement issues and awkward phrasing. Improving grammatical accuracy and sentence variety would strengthen the essay.