Some people believe governments should spend money on building train and subway lines to reduce traffic congestion. Others think that building more and wider roads is the better way to reduce traffic congestion.Consider both arguments and present your viewpoint.
Question
Some people believe governments should spend money on building train and subway lines to reduce traffic congestion. Others think that building more and wider roads is the better way to reduce traffic congestion.Consider both arguments and present your viewpoint.
Your Essay
Câu chứa lỗi
Gợi ý sửa
Giải thích
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6
Overall Band
6
Task Response
6
Coherence
6
Lexical
6
Grammar
The essay addresses the task by considering both perspectives on reducing traffic congestion. However, it lacks sufficient development of ideas and examples to fully support the arguments presented. The essay structure is clear, but the conclusion is missing. Vocabulary is generally appropriate, but there is room for greater variety and precision. Grammar is mostly accurate, but there are some issues with sentence structures.
The essay considers both arguments, which satisfies the task requirements. However, the discussion is underdeveloped with limited examples and explanations for each perspective. The writer's viewpoint is clear but lacks depth in supporting arguments.
The essay has a logical structure with an introduction and body paragraph, but it lacks a conclusion. Ideas are presented clearly, but transitions between sentences and ideas could be improved for better cohesion.
Vocabulary is appropriate but limited in range. There is some repetition, and the essay would benefit from more varied and sophisticated language to enhance the argument.
Grammar is generally accurate, but sentence structures are simple and lack variety. More complex sentence forms and a wider range of grammatical structures would improve the essay.
Detailed Analysis by Paragraph
Question:
Some people believe governments should spend money on building train and subway lines to reduce traffic congestion. Others think that building more and wider roads is the better way to reduce traffic congestion.Consider both arguments and present your viewpoint.
Introduction
It is supposed that authorities should allocate resources to expand the rail network system to alleviate traffic jams while others argue that widening roads is a more practical policy to improve the traffic flow.
The introduction presents both sides of the argument clearly and introduces the writer's perspective. However, it could be strengthened by providing a brief overview of the reasons that will be discussed.
Body paragraph 1
From my perspective, developing public transport systems such as trains and subway lines can solve gridlock more effectively
The paragraph presents the writer's viewpoint but lacks elaboration. It needs to include reasons, examples, or evidence to support the argument that public transport systems are more effective.
Body paragraph 2
The essay is missing a second body paragraph discussing the opposing viewpoint of widening roads. Including this would provide a balanced discussion and fulfill the task requirements more effectively.
Conclusion
The essay lacks a conclusion, which is essential for summarizing the arguments and reinforcing the writer's perspective. A conclusion should restate the main points and offer a final thought or recommendation.
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