Large companies should pay higher salaries to CEOs and executives compared to other workers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Question
Large companies should pay higher salaries to CEOs and executives compared to other workers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your Essay
Câu chứa lỗi
Gợi ý sửa
Giải thích
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5.5
Overall Band
5
Task Response
5
Coherence
6
Lexical
5
Grammar
The essay addresses the task but lacks depth in its arguments. While the writer shares a clear opinion, the reasons provided are not fully developed or supported with evidence. The essay demonstrates some coherence, but there are issues with grammar and vocabulary that affect clarity.
The essay presents a position on the topic and provides some reasons for it. However, the arguments are not sufficiently developed, and there is a lack of supporting evidence. The example of Elon Musk is used but not effectively linked to the main argument. The essay would benefit from more detailed explanations and examples.
The essay has a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the ideas are not logically sequenced, and there is a lack of clear topic sentences and linking words. This makes it difficult to follow the argument at times.
The essay uses a range of vocabulary, but there are errors in word choice and formality. Phrases such as 'a opinion' and 'an pivotal roles' demonstrate inaccuracies. The attempt to use more complex vocabulary is evident but not always successful.
There are frequent grammatical errors in the essay, including issues with subject-verb agreement, punctuation, and sentence structure. These errors sometimes obscure meaning and detract from the overall clarity of the writing.
Detailed Analysis by Paragraph
Question:
Large companies should pay higher salaries to CEOs and executives compared to other workers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Introduction
There is a opinion that directors and executives should be paid higher salaries than other staffs. From my perspective, I totally agree with this view and the essay below will give some reasons about it.
The introduction states the writer's position but lacks a strong thesis statement. The phrase 'a opinion' should be 'an opinion,' and 'staffs' should be 'staff.'
Body paragraph 1
Nowadays, there are a lot of corporations that tend to pay higher incomes to directors, for some factors. To begin with, It is undoubtedly that leaders usually have better social skills than others subordinates. This helps leaders to have ability of operating and orientating several staffs efficiently and well. Moreover, they play an pivotal roles in tackling companys problems and cooperating with other organizations, which have major contribution to the business success or failure. For instance, we all know Elon Musk, who is a large CEO and founder of Space X and Tesla. He is a intelligent and far-sighted person. When he began to dismiss all of subordinates who did not have same thoughts, ideas and sights of him, he research deeply in AI and environmentally friendly energy sources. He started to create electric vehicles, and sky rockets, which have great contribution to his success and property. After a few years, he became a richest person in the world.
This paragraph attempts to provide reasons and an example but lacks clarity and focus. Errors such as 'It is undoubtedly' and 'an pivotal roles' affect readability. The example of Elon Musk is interesting but not directly linked to the argument about salary justification.
Body paragraph 2
On the other hand, executives receives higher salaries than others, which means that they contributed a lot in the development of companies. They also are people who motivates their workers to want be more hard-working to reach a higher position in corporation.
This paragraph presents an additional reason but is underdeveloped. There are grammatical issues, such as 'executives receives' and 'to want be more hard-working.' The ideas are not fully explained or supported.
Conclusion
In conclusion, I reckon that managers positions should be prioritize to gain much higher compensation because of their achievement and dedication.
The conclusion restates the writer's position but does not effectively summarize the main points. The phrase 'should be prioritize' should be 'should be prioritized.'
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