Evaluation for Question #8697

Some people feel that manufacturers and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of goods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Question

Some people feel that manufacturers and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of goods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Your Essay

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6.5
Overall Band
7
Task Response
6
Coherence
6
Lexical
6
Grammar

The essay addresses the task by discussing both views and providing an opinion. The writer presents a clear position and supports it with relevant arguments. However, the essay could benefit from clearer organization and more precise language use to enhance coherence and lexical resource.

The essay discusses both views and provides a clear opinion on the issue. The main points are relevant and supported with examples. However, the essay could further elaborate on the opposing view and provide a more balanced discussion.

The essay is generally coherent, with a logical progression of ideas. However, the organization of ideas could be clearer, particularly in connecting the ideas within paragraphs. Some sentences and ideas are not clearly linked, affecting the overall cohesion.

The vocabulary used is adequate for discussing the topic, but there are instances of inappropriate word choice and awkward phrasing. The essay could benefit from a wider range of vocabulary and more precise language.

The writer demonstrates a reasonable control of grammatical structures, but there are noticeable errors in sentence structure and phrasing. These errors occasionally impede understanding and detract from the overall clarity of the essay.

Detailed Analysis by Paragraph

Question:
Some people feel that manufacturers and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of goods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Introduction

Some individuals say that diminishing the number of products’ packaging is the obligation of producing companies and supermarkets. However, others assume that people should not consume items having many layers of cover. In my opinion, producing or using items having no outer covers is hard for both manufacturing businesses, stores and buyers.

Body paragraph 1

On the one hand, it is infeasible for customers to buy goods without packaging. To begin with, buyers tend to choose their products based on the information and images on the outer layers. As a consequence, buying no cover products makes people not understand about those that they use. Moreover, buyers always want to ensure the quality of their items that they consume. For example, when buying a food product, they will buy the one covered carefully and having longer expiration printing on its packaging.

Body paragraph 2

On the other hand, one of the major reasons why manufacturing businesses and shops should be responsible for the amount of packaging for goods is that they may harm the environment. Most covers of products are not used when people buy them while they are made of plastic or other material that is ecological unfriendly. As a result, they will significantly contribute a large amount of waste into the ecosystem. However, it seems to be difficult to avoid producing things with packaging since it could have negative effects on the income of those businesses. The exterior layer is created to protect the quality of the products and make them more appealing, which encourages people to buy them. Instead, companies and stores should use environmentally friendly materials as an alternative to make the outer covers, which not only helps ease the effects on the environment but also maintain the products’ quality and appearance.

Conclusion

In conclusion, while it is impossible for both manufacturing or selling companies and consumers to avoid things with outer packaging, in my perspective, the businesses should use other types of material which is eco-friendly to produce the exterior covers for their goods.

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