Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment; only governments and large companies can make a difference. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Question
Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment; only governments and large companies can make a difference. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Your Essay
Câu chứa lỗi
Gợi ý sửa
Giải thích
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5
Overall Band
5
Task Response
5
Coherence
5
Lexical
5
Grammar
The essay presents a clear position but lacks complete development of ideas and examples. There are issues with coherence, cohesion, and grammatical accuracy. The essay ends abruptly, indicating incomplete ideas.
The essay provides a clear stance that both individuals and larger entities should collaborate for environmental improvement. However, it lacks full development of ideas and supporting examples. The argument is not fully explored, and the essay is incomplete.
The essay has some logical organization, but the abrupt ending and lack of proper paragraphing affect the cohesion. Transitions between ideas could be improved for better flow.
The vocabulary is adequate but lacks variety and precision. There are some spelling errors, such as 'bussiness' instead of 'business.' The range of vocabulary could be expanded for a higher score.
The grammar is generally understandable but includes errors. Sentence structures are basic and there are issues with subject-verb agreement and word choice. The essay ends mid-sentence, indicating incomplete thought.
Detailed Analysis by Paragraph
Question:
Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment; only governments and large companies can make a difference. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Introduction
Environmental issues have become a concern in this day and age. There is a great controversy whether individuals can contribute to improve the environment or governments and bussiness can alone make a difference. In my perspective, I strongly believe that both residents and politics, large companies should collaborate to better the environment conditions.
The introduction sets up the topic and presents a clear opinion. However, it contains a spelling error and awkward phrasing in 'residents and politics, large companies.' Clarity could be improved.
Body paragraph 1
On the one hand, individuals can take several actions to decrease adverse impact on the environment. Firstly, using public transportation instead of driving personal vehicles can help reduce emission. These individual actions, though small on their own, collectively contribute to a significant reduction in environmental harm. For example, Secondly,
The paragraph starts well by providing a specific action individuals can take, but it ends abruptly without completing the thought or providing the second example. This affects the development and coherence of the paragraph.
Body paragraph 2
The essay lacks a second body paragraph, which is necessary to fully address the task and provide a balanced view regarding the role of governments and large companies.
Conclusion
The essay lacks a conclusion, which is essential for summarizing the main points and reinforcing the writer's opinion. A conclusion should restate the thesis and provide closure.
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