Evaluation for Question #8698

Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment; only governments and large companies can make a difference. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Question

Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment; only governments and large companies can make a difference. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Your Essay

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7.5
Overall Band
8
Task Response
8
Coherence
7
Lexical
7
Grammar

The essay provides a clear and well-structured argument, addressing the task effectively. The writer presents a balanced view, acknowledging the roles of both governments and individuals in environmental improvement. The essay is coherent, with logical progression and well-linked ideas. The vocabulary is varied and appropriate, and grammatical structures are mostly accurate, with some minor errors.

The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout. It acknowledges the roles of both governments and individuals in environmental improvement, providing relevant examples to support the arguments. The essay could be enhanced by further elaborating on how individuals' actions influence larger entities.

The essay is well-organized with clear progression of ideas. Paragraphs are logically structured, and cohesive devices are used effectively to link ideas. However, transitions between some ideas could be smoother for better flow.

The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary relevant to the topic. The use of terms like 'sustainable practices' and 'renewable energy' is precise. There is occasional repetition, and some expressions could be more varied to enhance lexical resource.

The essay uses a variety of grammatical structures accurately. There are minor errors, such as in the use of articles and some awkward phrasing. Overall, the grammatical range is appropriate, and errors do not impede understanding.

Detailed Analysis by Paragraph

Question:
Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment; only governments and large companies can make a difference. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Introduction

It is a widely held belief that only governments and big corporations have the power to make a difference in terms of environmental improvements. While it is true that these entities have significant influence and resources at their disposal, I agree that individuals also have the ability to bring positive impacts to the environment.

Body paragraph 1

To begin with, it does appear that improving the environment often involves policies and actions on large scales that require a colossal number of financial and human resources, which only governments and large corporations can afford. To be specific, governments hold the power to enact laws and regulations to bring about changes in protecting the environment or provide incentives to stimulate such processes. Meanwhile, big businesses are capable of investing in research to find solutions for environmental issues and integrating such initiatives deeply into their operations at industrial levels to make real changes. For instance, to reduce the amount of wastewater being released into rivers and the ocean, governments can establish stricter regulations mandating manufacturing companies to apply better water waste treatment processes to meet certain standards before discharging industrial waste into the environment. While the environmental benefits of such an activity are obvious, it may be impossible for any individual and only seems achievable with the combination of governments and corporations.

Body paragraph 2

However, individuals can certainly play a role in bringing about environmental improvements by adopting sustainable practices in their daily lives thanks to their collective effort. These can include reducing energy and water consumption, switching to renewable energy rather than fossil fuels, or supporting environmentally friendly products. The result of these actions for one individual may seem small, but when practiced on a large scale, they can add up to make significant impacts. Additionally, these impacts can sometimes grant people the concomitant advocacy right that may push governments and large enterprises to adapt to green initiatives at a faster pace. For instance, if every household opted for reusable bags instead of single-use plastic bags, it would not only result in a significant reduction in the amount of plastic pollution, but also force companies to abandon the production and distribution of plastic bags for greener alternatives.

Conclusion

In conclusion, although the government and big enterprises possess the ability and vast resources available to cope with environmental issues, individuals’ capabilities to positively influence environmental improvements due to their collective efforts and advocacy power should also be recognized.

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